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Below are the 14 most recent journal entries recorded in The Discordian Cookbook's LiveJournal:

Tuesday, June 10th, 2008
3:03 pm
Finding your PLATYPUS
The Platypus: Innocent little duck-beavers, or the servents of the SACRED CHAO?

Nobody can figure out a platypus. Manifestations of the Chao, says I.

Appendix 00001:

Seen here bathing in holywater.

Spleen 00002:

Known to wear socks apparently.

Pancreas 00003:

Intelligent enough to attain Doctor-ly degrees.

Lung 00004:

This one cleaverly snuck it's way into human society... Perhaps YOU know a platypus?

Kidney 00005:

The SACRED CHAO is located somewhere near the Cloaca, I'm sure of it.

Fellow Erisians, this must be investigated.

Monday, May 19th, 2008
2:39 pm
Discordian Cyberspace Masquerade
I know this is kind of off-topic, but...

So I got this e-mail about something cool going on. I think it's such a great idea that I'm taking it upon myself to tell LJ about it.

Hail Yes

I hadn't even realized it was Discordia's 50th (or 49th) anniversary. This is cool 'cause we get to celebrate the 50 year mark for two years in a row. It's our Golden Apple anniversary. =)

I love the idea of an online party which brings together Discordians from all s
ections of the web. It's also cool that it's anonymous. It'll make communication really interesting. I hope to swap some of my ideas with other people's ideas, and maybe get a page or two written for the book PDF thing they're putting together.

Anyway, there's not a lot of time until the party starts, so I'm trying to pass the invite around as quickly as possible. If you have any ideas for where else we should advertise, please post! Or optimally, you should go there and get some buzz going.

PLEASE post to your blogs, facebook groups, forums, whatever, wherever Discordians hang out.

I'll see you guys at the party! Hail Eris and HAIL Yes!
Sunday, April 6th, 2008
8:35 am
You must read this. It is about Draconian/Saurian conspiracy. While you have been sleeping, this is what your biatch Discordia has been up to. :
8:35 am
If you would like to make Allah cry, chant mantras and do breath-counting exercises. Any polysyllabic mantra chanted outloud or within one's mind, constantly, will be fit for this purpose.
And say "Shankar" once a day
P.S. "If you see Allah on a road, just say: I am not afraid of you, no no no I am not."
Sunday, March 23rd, 2008
12:46 am
The truth, a little 2 late
 Turns my evil sister has been lying a little. She is a Jihad Goddess. Supports no religion but Jihad. Captain Clark is some Saudi prince. 23 is an unlucky number, and 17 lucky, but only just. She did not start Discordian religion, she stole it from me and from Universal Reason. She does not like Zen-buddhists, she kills them in Tibet for bringing enlightenment into this world.

In short, do not trust Eris.

Also, Eris does not need a kitchen. She feeds children to her vampire friends uncooked. You know, the same children there are several hundred missing each year in U.S. 

P.P.S. Eris is actually an actress from "Weird Science" movie from 80's. She is not blonde, she stole my blue eye-shadows *growls*, and she has not aged since the movie was shot...rumours are she bathes in human blood.
Friday, July 20th, 2007
7:16 am
Butter Beer
1 pint real vanilla ice cream (use a brand that includes vanilla seed specks for best flavor or make your own)
1/4 cup real butter, at room temperature
1/2 teaspoon butterscotch extract
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1 quart apple cider

PREPARATION:On medium speed, beat together vanilla ice cream, butter, butterscotch extract, brown sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg until well-combined.

Pour into a container and re-freeze.

When ready to serve, gently heat apple cider in a saucepan until steaming hot.

Place 1 scoop of ice cream in a thick soda glass or large mug. Top with steaming apple cider.

Yield: 4 to 6 servings
Sunday, January 28th, 2007
10:34 am
Winter Hash

3 tablespoons olive oil
2 tablespoons butter
1 pound Yukon Gold potatoes, diced
1/2 pound fresh shiitake mushrooms, diced
1 red bell pepper, diced
1 small acorn squash, diced
1 shallot, finely chopped
2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 pinch salt
1 pinch ground black pepper
1 cup chopped kale
4 sprigs fresh sage

Place oil and butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Melt butter and mix in potatoes, mushrooms, pepper, squash, and shallot. Season with garlic powder, salt, and pepper. Cook 25 minutes, stirring occasionally, until potatoes are tender.

Mix kale and sage into skillet. Continue cooking 5 minutes, until kale is wilted. Serve and enjoy!
10:31 am
Mock Tuna Salad

1 (19 ounce) can garbanzo beans, drained and mashed
2 tablespoons mayonnaise
2 teaspoons spicy brown mustard
1 tablespoon sweet pickle relish
2 green onions, chopped
salt and pepper to taste

In a medium bowl, combine garbanzo beans, mayonnaise, mustard, relish, chopped green onions, salt and pepper. Mix well.
Monday, April 3rd, 2006
1:10 pm
Salsa Chicken Salad
1 pint sour cream
once 16 ounce jar chunky salsa
half of a 1 ounce package Hidden valley Original Ranch salad dressing mix
2 cups diced cooked chicken breast or two 8 ounce cans premium white-meat chicken
one 8 ounce can sliced water chestnuts
1 cup shredded pepper Jack cheese

In a large bowl, stir together the sour cream, salsa, and salad dressing mix. Fold in the chicken, water chestnuts, and cheese. Refrigerate until well chilled. Serve with chips, crackers or flour tortillas.

Another one from The Lady & Sons, Too!" cookbook by Paula Deen.
1:04 pm
Banana Bread
This is the BEST Banana Bread EVER

You can use an electric mixer or mix by hand.

1/2 cup [1 stick] butter, at room temperature
1 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour, sifted
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
3 ripe bananas, mashed.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 9x5-inch loaf pan. In a mixing bowl, combine butter and sugar; mix well. Add the salt, eggs, vanilla, flour, baking soda, baking powder and bananas, mix well. Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake for 50 minutes.

This recipe comes from The Lady & Sons, Too! cookbook by Paula Deen. ISBN # 0-375-75836-4
Sunday, February 19th, 2006
4:45 pm
Spaghetti Pie
from my Aunt Diane's cook book

6 ounces Spaghetti
2 tablespoons butter
1/3 cup grated parmesan cheese
2 well beaten eggs
1 - 8 oz cup cottage cheese
1 lb ground beef, [or turkey]
1/2 cup chopped onion
1/4 cup chopped green pepper [optional]
1- 8oz can [1 cup] stewed tomatos
1 - 6oz can tomato paste
1 teaspoon sugar
1 teaspoon oregano
1/2 teaspoon garlic salt or 1 - 2 cloves garlic
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

cook spaghetti according to package
drain [should be about three cups]
stir butter into hot spaghetti.
stir in parmesan, cheese and eggs.
form spaghetti mixture into a crust in a buttered 10" pie plate. spread cottage cheese over bottom of spaghetti crust.

cook ground beef/turkey, onion, pepper -- till vegetables are tender and meat is browned. drain off excess fat/grease. stir in tomato sauce, paste, sugar, oregano and garlic -- heat through.

turn meat mixture into spaghetti crust. bake uncovered in 350 degree oven for 20 minutes. sprinkle mozzarella cheese on top. bake 5 minutes longer or until cheese melts.
4:44 pm
Peanut Butter Bread
Beak Caws Peanut Butter is God's perfect food. [Next to Coffee, that is]

2 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup sugar
1 teaspoon salt
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 cups milk
1/2 cup peanut butter

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.
Combine dry ingredients. Add milk and peanut butter. Pour into a greased 8 by 4 by 3-inch loaf pan. Bake for approximately 50 minutes. Serve with your favorite jam.
Friday, February 17th, 2006
9:36 pm
Little Angels of Satan
1 lb of medium-large raw shrimp (peel and de-vein it yourself, unless of course, you are a pussy)
1.5 Tbsp of cayenne pepper powder
2 Tsp of Adobo seasoning (or garlic salt)
1 tsp of flour
3/4 cup of olive oil (flavored or unflavored, your choice)
1 jar store-bought alfredo sauce

2 portions brown rice or pasta of your choice

Peel and de-vein the shrimp (but of course, YOU proobly skipped this step and bought it already cleaned....Wuss) The shrimp MUST be raw...it holds flavor much better than otherwise

Pour the oil into a large skillet and heat on a medium high flame....spinkle a copious amount of cayenne powder in the olive oil for good measure

Mix in a small container 1 tbsp Cayenne pepper, 1 tsp flour, one tsp of adobo seasoning...lightly coat the shrimp in this concoction...or better yet...pour all the ingredianys directly on the shrimp and mix with your hands....then relish the sensation of every single cut in your hands flaring in agony.

Cover the shrimp and put in the fridge for 1/2 an hour if you wish to allow the flavor to set...but that's up to you.

Fry the shrimp in the skillet, until pink (2 minutes a side should do it...maybe sooner) put shrimp to the side and keep warm (the plate over plate method works)

reduce the flame to low and pour the entire container of alfredo sauce into the skillet....and mix it with the leavings of the shrimp. stir occasionally to keep from sticking.

If you have any extra seasoning...you may add it if you wish... Waste not, want not

When the sauce begins to bubble, add the shrimp and set to simmer for 3-5 minutes.

pour over your favorite rice, pasta, etc.

The great thing about this dish is at first, the alfredo hides the heat until AFTER you swallow your first bite...then following, each consecutive bite increases in heat until alomost unbearable. I am personally lactose intolerant and went through two LARGE glasses of milk for my half a pound of shrimp.

There is NO good way to cool your palette off after this meal. it taste amazing....but the back of your throat will hate you.

Current Mood: amused
Tuesday, February 14th, 2006
11:47 pm
To Start! Jesus Fish!
1 filet of tilapia(Jesus Fish!)
1/2 unleavened bread crumbs(...For it is holy)
1 teaspoon ground mustard (for faith)
wine for marinade (Red...fish don't bleed without it!)
Salt(preferably from Utah (for "Yea are the salt of the Earth")
olive oil
5 thick-ish skewers
Kitchen string

Marinade tilapia in wine (red would be more authentic, but white probobly would be to better effect) for aproximately one hour

Remove fish from marinade, mix breadcrumbs, salt, and mustard in a small bowl, then cover the fish lightly in breading.

Take 4 skewers,anoint them thoroughly in olive oil.

Trap the fish firmly between the shape of the cross on both sides, tying all four points together with the kitchen string.

Your fish should be pretty mobile at this point and easily moved without ickiness just by holding one end of the joined skewers.

Now at this point, you can either steam the little dude, or put him in the grill...as long as he doesn't touch metal of the grill itself...he might stick.

Poke in the side with the last skewer, when it flakes...it's done. (it may bleed a little if the wine doesn't evaporate)

Serves one...unless you have a few loaves of bread to go with it, then leftovers are a possibility

refridgerate and use the fish in another recipe three days later.....

Current Mood: creative
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